Let's Get Topical, Topical.....

Hello,

Let's get down to business; due to the deluge of a single vote, I will be doing a healthy combination of personal, ambiguous, topical, and creative writing to compose my blogs. Thank you to everyone who voted....no seriously it was just one, thanks Krista.


I have been watching the Republican National Convention the last three days, not because I was actually willing to accept what they were going to say, but I wanted to get pissed off and liberal about the 8 shades of ludicrous that would occur. I have complied a list of some of the WTF moments for your reading pleasure.........and more specifically, mine. Sorry Matt Doerr.


-The sea of white on white on navy blue - white hair, white people, navy blue suits. It was like the foam on top of a Welches grape soda. They tried to show any ethnic people that were in the audience, but they were few and far between.


-Crazy hats. Sun hats, baseball caps, cowboy hats, army hats, elephant hats, over-sized top hats. Geez people, you know what they say about people who over-do their personality on the outside........they are compensating for something on the inside- yikes!


-I know there were gays and drag queens at the D.N.C., but some of those republican ladies were given them moes a run for their money. Feather boas, crazy make up, gaudy dresses. Watch out Rue Paul, drag's getting crazy conservative.


-The hilarious video on NBC news replaying W.'s speech in absentia. There were pauses for the audience response, but they just showed him talking and smiling and waiting- without the audience feed. He looked like a Jim Henson Muppet when the audience doesn't get the joke-Dr. Teeth, I'm lookin' at you!


-McCain's crypt keeper mother. 96! Giggawha? How is she standing, talking, breathing, anything? I believe that she is really McCain's sister and they have some type of twin power that will keep both of them alive.......FOREVER! Think about it, he's "72", God help us, if he gets elected he'll be "80" by the time he runs 2 terms(Clearly 8 years is going to be the average stay in office because the American public is to lazy to vote someone out). How many competent 80 people do you know? I feel that the Republican party is voting for the V.P. because homeboy's gonna kick it.


-Doesn't Sarah Palin look like the love child of Tina Fey and Megan Mulally? It's odd, I love Tina, I love Megan........not so much a fan of Palin. Her family is a little too real for me, 5 kids-HELLO!?! help control the pet population, have you Palins spayed or neutered .


-I'm not saying I'm perfect, but McCain, please whiten your teeth.


-Who was that rioter and can we hang out?


-The crowd had way more energy than McCain. My mom, a devout republican, was falling a sleep. I know that's not saying much, but she had invested in listening. By the end of the speech the only thing she could comment on was how soft his voice was. Clearly, good public speaking has never been a concern of the Republican party.

In the next election I'm voting for the Ralph Nadar/Michael Moore ticket.